Black Learners, Bright Futures

Puberty is a critical transition phase in a child’s development, marked not only by physical changes but also by significant shifts in mental, emotional, and social growth. These changes can create imbalances in a child’s learning journey, impacting their motivation, focus, and self-confidence. As children navigate this complex period, they often face challenges in maintaining their motivation for learning. Understanding the impact of puberty on development and motivation, and learning how to support children during this time, is essential for parents who wish to help their children stay balanced and engag

But how puberty affects motivation and learning ?

The transition through puberty affects nearly every area of a child’s life, from how they view themselves to how they interact with others. These changes can create obstacles that disrupt their motivation and focus in school or other learning environments.

1. Biological Changes and Cognitive Development

During puberty, hormonal shifts affect not only physical appearance but also brain function. The surge of hormones such as estrogen and testosterone impacts areas of the brain associated with emotion, impulse control, and decision-making. While cognitive abilities, like problem-solving and abstract thinking, are developing, these hormonal changes can make it harder for adolescents to maintain focus or motivation for academic tasks, leading to fluctuating interests and attention spans.

2. Emotional and Social Challenges

Adolescents experience heightened emotions and become more self-conscious during puberty, often worrying about how they are perceived by their peers. As a result, social relationships take on new significance, sometimes even overshadowing academic responsibilities. Peer pressure and the desire to fit in can affect a child’s motivation for learning, especially if they perceive academic achievements as being less “cool” or aligned with their social identity. In primary school, one of my boys was keen on History class, we even bought him the “Horrible Histories” collection books. But when he started secondary school he just shifted his interest away from it, and from what I understood he wanted to be amongst the athletes as it’s more “cool” (wondering why 🤔👀).

3. Shift in Interests and Identity Formation

The desire for independence and self-expression becomes stronger during puberty. Adolescents begin to explore their own interests, opinions, and values, which may differ from those of their parents or teachers. This search for identity can lead them to question established norms, sometimes resulting in a drop in motivation for traditional learning or academic subjects if they don’t see immediate relevance. It was all about you when their were little, and today it’s all about their friends. From the way they dressed to what they want to eat, their favourite things is to say “So and so’s mum bought him this” and generally my take is to answer : “I’m not their mum but yours 🤷🏾‍♀️” #SorryNotSorry

4. Increased Sensitivity to Criticism

As adolescents become more self-aware and self-critical, they may also become more sensitive to feedback from teachers, parents, and peers. Negative comments or perceived failures can be internalized and impact their self-esteem, reducing motivation and engagement in activities they previously enjoyed. This is especially true if they face academic challenges or struggle with certain subjects. As you already probably know they can go to dark phases where they are less motivated and just want to isolate themselves. Remember yourself at that age, yeah I know not a good look so be kind and supportive.

So how parents can support their children’s development and motivation ?

Parents play an essential role in helping children navigate the transition through puberty. By providing understanding, encouragement, and appropriate support, parents can help their children maintain a balanced approach to learning and motivation.

1. Encourage Open Communication

Building a strong foundation of open and non-judgmental communication is crucial. Adolescents need to feel that they can express their thoughts, worries, and challenges without fear of criticism. Actively listening to your child’s experiences, validating their feelings, and offering guidance can help them navigate this period with greater confidence.

Tip: Ask open-ended questions, such as, “What’s been on your mind lately?” or “How do you feel about your next week football match?” This shows that you’re genuinely interested in their thoughts and feelings. Don’t push if they want to be left alone but demonstrate sincere interest.

2. Help Them Set Realistic Goals

Adolescents benefit from setting achievable, short-term goals that they can work towards, which helps them build a sense of accomplishment and progress. Breaking down larger academic or personal goals into smaller, manageable steps helps children see the relevance and benefits of staying motivated.

Tip: Encourage your child to identify one or two academic or personal goals for each week. For instance, when my child struggled with algebra, the goal was to complete one extra practice exercise. And it worked in no times, celebrating these small wins reinforced his motivation and resilience. I’ve learned the SMART method during a training session at work, and I use it any time I need it. Of course, I passed it on to my children, and it has tremendously helped them to gain clarity and stay motivated in the face of challenges on their learning journey.

3. Promote a Growth Mindset

Encouraging a growth mindset—where children believe that abilities and intelligence can be developed through effort and practice—can help them stay motivated even in the face of setbacks. Teach them that mistakes are part of learning and encourage them to view challenges as opportunities to grow.

Tip: Reinforce the importance of effort by praising hard work and perseverance rather than results. For example, instead of saying “Why you only score C ?,” say “I’m really proud of how hard you worked for your mock test.” And to illustrate that failure is part of the process, I usually share stories about my past failure to show empathy and support when it’s a tough one for them.

4. Be Patient with Mood and Behavior Changes

During puberty, adolescents may have sudden changes in mood and behavior, which can impact their willingness to engage in learning. Practice patience and understand that these fluctuations are often temporary. Let them know that you’re there for them without pressuring them to “snap out of it.”

Tip: Offer a comforting presence and check in gently. Instead of asking why they’re upset, simply say, “I’m here if you’d like to talk or if you need anything.” Parenting is about nurturing and building healthy and functional adults, so don’t take it too personal when they throw an attitude to your decision. Be firm when they act out of pockets and be patient as it’s not about you, just a challenging period for the family. Been there, still are, stay strong 💪🏾

5. Encourage a Balanced Lifestyle

Physical health plays a significant role in motivation and learning. Encourage a balanced lifestyle that includes physical activity, healthy eating, and sufficient rest. Engaging in activities outside of academics, such as sports, music, or creative hobbies, provides a healthy outlet for stress and can reinvigorate motivation.

Tip: Lead by example by maintaining healthy habits yourself, and encourage family activities like evening walks or weekend hikes to help your child manage stress. Monitor screen time and set some rules like “No screen at dinner table” as it’s an occasion to get some inputs about how their day was, it’s also table etiquette but present it as a privileged moment for family. Listen carefully their stories that’s how you’ll know what’s going on without asking for it, let them feel loved and valued.

6. Provide Positive Role Models

Adolescents often look to others for guidance, and they can benefit from role models who demonstrate perseverance, adaptability, and curiosity. Whether it’s family members, mentors, or public figures, positive role models can show children the value of staying motivated and following through with their goals.

Tip: Introduce your child to stories of people who overcame challenges to succeed in areas that interest them, one of my son is passionate about football we spent time watching documentaries about his favourite players : “Pele, Ronaldo R9 and CR7, All or nothing series”. This inspired him to stay committed to his goals, even during difficult times, moreover he started watching other documentaries. You are and have to be the primary source of inspiration for them, as it has been backed by science that children learned from mimicking adults. So don’t expect your kids to be off screen if you passed your day on social media. In a nutshell: ” Practice what you preach”, instead they will tend to believe that you’re not consistent enough to be listened to.

7. Limit the Pressure and Focus on Enjoyment

While academic success is important, excessive pressure to perform can lead to burnout and reduced motivation. Encourage your child to pursue activities and hobbies that they genuinely enjoy, which helps them build intrinsic motivation—finding joy and satisfaction in learning or creating simply because they love it.

Tip: Encourage your child to try new activities that they might find interesting, even if they’re unrelated to academics. This could include anything from painting to cooking, allowing them to explore and discover what they’re passionate about. I personally took a coding class to learn more about my son’s interest in IT, now I’m prepared to have those conversations with him and share opinions on the future of technology.

Conclusion

The transition through puberty can be a challenging time for children, as they experience rapid changes that impact their learning and motivation. With the right support and understanding, parents can help children manage these challenges and continue to grow academically, emotionally, and personally. By fostering open communication, setting realistic goals, promoting a growth mindset, and encouraging a balanced lifestyle, you can provide a foundation that keeps your children motivated and resilient through this transformative stage. As adolescents learn to navigate these changes with the support of their parents, they become better equipped to adapt, thrive, and carry these essential skills into adulthood. I know it’s a hard task to perform, but do the heavy lifting NOW and enjoy their way to adulthood. Share the worst thing you ever said in terms of parenting your teenagers, mine was to tell them :”If I have talked this way to my own parents, I would probably not be here today” as I was saying it I was thinking *Oooh that’s sound just like my mum, a terrible feeling 😅*